This isn’t actually an “official” product review, because (as you know if you’ve read my blog for long) I don’t do toy reviews. Not (to paraphrase Seinfeld) that there’s “anything wrong with that.” It’s just not my thing. There are a few exceptions to this rule, but those aren’t because I’ve been solicited by a toy company or been sent a toy for free to review, it’s because I happen to love a certain product (my Njoy buttplugs, or my new Eleven, for instance) and I want to rave about them.
In the example of the Corian® Lollipop, a toy that a good friend of ours makes, it was given to us to try out, not so I would post a review here, but because he wanted some feedback on it and an honest assessment of what we thought about it. He makes toys and sells them at lifestyle parties, such as Kinky Kollege, and through his website at http://www.1211kink.com. He is also the one with whom I had had my incredible “Watermelon” scenes. So when he gave me the Lollipop at my birthday in Chicago, and asked us to review it for him, I was thrilled to do so. I already had a heavy plastic version of a Lollipop that I’d bought at IML (and enjoyed quite a bit) so I was curious how this one would compare.
I’m no neophyte to thuddy toys. I’ve come to realize I like them quite a bit, although I might not have characterized my preferences that way a few years ago. But I’ve come to find something very satisfying – primal, almost – in the deep, bruising, tissue- and muscle-deep pain, that heavy toys engender.
The Lollipop does not disappoint in this regard.
It looks harmless enough. Sixteen inches long, 2″ in diameter, and a little more than a quarter of an inch thick, and made of very pretty Corian® of various colors. It’s pretty, right? And, you know…how bad can that little piece of counter-top be?
Ohmyfuckinggod can it pack a wallop! Do not let its beauty or small size fool you. In fact, as I have come to learn (many, many times!), the small size may make its impact all that much more intense (I think it’s some kind of physics thing.)
It’s that “many, many times” thing that prompted me to write a review here on the blog. Because we have had a lot of fun with the Lollipop. Most recently, W used it on me during this scene:
He had instructed me to pull my top down, and then tied me so that my breasts were exposed like this…
…so that I thought that he was going to use the Evil Stick that I’d brought back from Atlanta and the similar “Sadistik” that a certain local Top had made and given to us this past weekend on them. (All in the interests of research, of course – I wanted to compare them.)
What happened was quite different, however.
But first the funny part (funny in that twisted, fucked-up way that these things amuse me)…that thought – that he was going to whip my breasts with those painful, evil whipping sticks – made me wet. Even as I hated and dreaded the thought, because my nipples are soooo sensitive. I knew it was going to be awful, and it still made me wet. So much so that W even commented on it later. Okay, some of that was sweat – crouching there in a squat for that long is not easy, and although it looks like I am resting on the wooden pony, I am actually not, because it hurt to have my breastbone on it for long. So mostly I was squatting there, hovering, legs trembling and burning.
For I don’t know how long.
I kept wondering if the tittie whipping would distract me enough to forget about my spasming leg muscles, or if I wouldn’t be able to handle both sensations at once and would, I don’t know, die or something. But damn, that position was hot. Exposed breasts, presented to him for whipping, and me tied down like a slab of meat, unable to move or pull away. My breasts were so deliciously sensitive, and I was so hyper-aware of my vulnerability, that I whimpered and cried out just from him pulling on them to position them the way he wanted.
Yeah, how could I not be wet?
But, as sometimes happens, the original plan went out the window at some point. I don’t know if it was that he saw my ass, so round and inviting, presented to him so fetchingly, that changed his mind…
…or if it was my very wetness that made him decide to attack me from behind instead. But attack me he did, with the Lollipop. And his fingers. And then his cock.
I can attest that that thuddy piece of countertop (and orgasms) does distract one from the agony of a squat. At least for a time. And oh my does it leave some lovely, distinctive marks!
But though I may have yowled and howled and squirmed (and actually got my hands somewhat loose, something I seldom do, even in the direst of circumstances) that certainly doesn’t mean I’ve had enough of this toy!
Finally, I have a brief review of the Lollipop from W’s perspective:
The Lollipop has become a frequently turned-to item in my vast collection of tools. When acquiring a new item one never knows how useful it will really be. Some may be precisely the right tool for that special occasion. Others are workhorses, frequently called upon to perform a single function. And sadly some seldom see the light of day. The Lollipop has versatility, and I find myself calling upon it in an ever increasing number of diverse situations.
As soon as you pick up the Lollipop it is clear that it is meant for serious business. A hard solid end and carefully considered shaft length. The designer clearly knows the intensity of the impact it can inflict. But I have become very pleased to discover the softer side of this cleaver little tool and the versatility with which its aggressiveness can be used. I love an item with multiple personalities and go out of my way to use a thing in ways not necessarily intended. This item is a delight.
The very first time I used it, I sort of boxed myself into a situation where I had limited access to my victim. I had placed her in a cage, which, though aesthetically appealing, left me with limited access to her. The Lollipop solved the problem easily. The short but stiff shaft allowed me to deliver short, accurate and significant blows even as I had to manipulate complex angles to wield it.
Since then I have used it on many occasions. It can deliver a serious wallop and leave the perfectly round evidence to prove it. When getting down to the business of serious impact, one might think the shaft length could be longer, but I find it to be ideal. One can deliver extremely serious blows easily and with precise control. Any longer a shaft and I would be concerned about delivering too severe a blow inaccurately. The moderate shaft length is another reason I turn to this tool so frequently. The Lollipop is ideal for close-quarter play. One can grab and grapple with one’s victim and still deliver blows of significance. I even choke up on the shaft frequently to deliver an even sharper blow. I can use it to apply pressure to the skin or massage almost any area of the body.
It plays a sensual role too. The disk at the end of the shaft has a diameter and thickness that is perfect for pressing between a woman’s lower lips, and the shaft is rigid enough so that the tool can both caress and probe that space between the legs. The hard, smooth material easily glides over any portion of the skin and the possibilities of temperature play are not lost on the user either.
Finally, it’s a handsome tool. The composition and surface makes it an unusual one in the toy bag. An item to show (and use on) one’s friends.
So there you have it! Go, buy! For real. I guarantee you will not be disappointed.
And tell him Jade sent you. ;-)